So I have done some research and worked my way through a slew of ‘slow travel, ‘location independent’, ’ ‘out of the box’, ‘non conformity’ blogs.There are tons of them. Some are really, really good. Some are just spam machines trying to get you to buy silly ebooks, courses and to pay for advice that other better blogs give you for free without the added claim of having ‘the’ solution. Much more agreeable in other words.

What struck me more than anything is the gender division, it is very divided indeed. Money-talk, especially fast money talk is the mens’ domain. Success, personal and money success is all men talk. Quality of life, combining family and travel, finding oneself, education/worldschooling/unschooling is womens’ domain. Sometimes the two cross, but mostly not. Some women talk about making money as a location independent person, but it usually stops at blogging, travel writing the odd freelance gig or two. Men however, talk about grand schemes, running enormous location independent seminars on beaches in the Philippines whilst chugging down the beer, meetings and important pow wows (isn’t that what we are trying to get away from?). The mens’ blogs are more preachy, more assertive and certain, do this, do that, whereas the female blogs are more reflective, more grateful for the opportunity of change Mind you, this a general observation and naturally several blogs deviate from the mean.

I much prefer the toned down blogs, the ones depicting real life and real hurdles and such, to the scheming ones that claim to, in so many easy steps, tell you how to rebuild your life, how to be free and successful. Anyone who has attempted and maybe even succeeded at a reconfiguration of life, know that it is not easy, it is not fast. Especially not as a family. It involves not just one person’s feeling, but severals and it takes money, time and resources. Building a business to support ‘nomadic’ or ‘location independent’ or a ‘tiny house, downsized’ what have you life, is not done fast or easily. Anyone who claims otherwise probably already started with a pretty good bourse. There are no set steps to changing a lifestyle, there are no set steps to building a business to sustain you and your family. The biggest hurdles are internal, getting over all the musts we have been taught and programmed to adhere to. One day simply getting up and disavowing all that we know and all that everyone else still subscribes to is not simple. It involves other people’s feelings, it involves considerations and planning and thinking and evaluating. It involves being so sure that you are strong enough to say no to all that everyone else holds certain and true, from traditional schooling to traditional housing and traditional employment. Deviating in one such area is hard enough, deviating from all is scary.

So what is up with the divide? Why do women focus on the emotional aspects and men on the traditional success stories? Or I am the only one who ses it?

There seems to be so many misconceptions regarding childhood vaccinations: misconceptions on how vaccinations actually work, on how herd immunity actually works, on weather the diseases we vaccinate against are really all that dangerous. The misconceptions are rampant, and so is the sheer ignorance.

My main question to all those with homed grown theories on why vaccinations are bad, unnecessary or don’t work: are you an epidemiologist or immunologist or even a medical professional of any kind? How much time have you spent researching disease and vaccinations (and I mean for real, not my reading dumb as blogs) What amount of time have you actually spent in labs? With patients? Honestly, do you even know your viruses from you bacteria? No? So why the fuck do you presume to know more than those good people who devote their lives to studying, learning, developing vaccines to save our sorry lives? Why the hell do you not realize that the only reason we are all here, alive and well , is because diseases have been eradicated or controlled due to all the major advances made by real researchers, not at home fanatics.

Think about it? Why would you take a stand against all the combined knowledge of people who have studied this shit or years, experts from all over the world, from all religions, from all political fields who agree on this? Do you say the same to your mechanics? Nah, I don’t need your expertise, I will just listen  to some crackpots online and fix my own damn car brakes. Or your electrician, I will just rewire my own house and if I electrocute my kids so be it. Or would you fly your own god damn jumbo jet, after all how hard can it be, there must a manual online somewhere?  You wouldn’t do that , now would you? So why, oh why, would you assume that you know well enough to decide whether vaccinations work or not, are safe or not, save lives or not.

And don’t even get me started on the abhorrent, uncivilized, selfishness of antivaxxers

Let me assure you the human body is a hell of  alot more complicated than either of those examples, yet for some crackpot reason mommies and daddies around the world think they have singlehandedly cracked the code and just know (read: belive in their silly little hearts) that they know better than those who actually have studied the area.

Take a look at this Pen and Teller short video. It really is that simple.

I had never been to Mallorca before my visit in October. Why do I make that comment as if it is surprising? Because it is and I have also meant to and wanted to go to see what the fuss was all about. For many years Swedes have kind of viewed Mallorca, the Gran Canarias and a larger general southern Spanish region as our vacation home. We flock there for the sun (and yes many have traditionally come for the inexpensive sangria) and have since the early days of charter Tourism. This has had its consequences, for many years no one who considered themselves ‘real’ travelers would set their foot there, it was considered de classe. However over the last few years Mallorca has especially made a comeback, and acquired a reputation as a more upscale destination, promoting its history, architecture and natural beauty, rather than its all night bars and booze.

Mallorca, with picturesque, gentrified if you will, towns such as Deia, Portal Nous, Pollensa, and Valldemossa are now playground to the rich and famous. Palma de Mallorca boasts some excellent, and expensive restaurants, luxury shopping and the whole island is cleaned up and prettified. It is undoubtedly a very, very pretty island and offers so much more than its albeit pretty beaches.

 Northern Europeans, as well as Spaniards of course, purchase (seriously expensive) restored stone houses and mansions and stay over the winter. There are several international schools, from the rigid British curriculum uniform kind to more approachable, earth loving,  kind. Many smaller towns are very quiet  in the colder months but the larger cities boast year round tourism attractions and of course, colder in mallorca, does not mean that cold.

 I went to Mallorca with my mother and son. It was a last minute spur of the moment idea and so we booked, based on recommendations a package trip.  Normally I spend an inordinate amount of time researching my destinations and lodgings, but this time I didn’t have time. Besides, my mother having been to Mallorca many times to visit friends (who albeit live in a pretty stone house at the top of the old parts of Palma town, with views to die for), the hotel having received great reviews and my mother saying she had not seen any bad parts of Mallorca on her visits, we figured how bad can it be? We also wanted  a hotel with a kids play group for my son and a location near palma so we could easily visit with my mother’s friends,  and there were not many available hotels to chose from. Well should not have done that. It can be very bad.

Since my early days of traveling, when funds were so scarce I prioritized drink and food over decent lodgings, I have not stayed in anything as unappetizing as this place. It was so long ago that I stayed in such a ugly, worn down, uncharming, inhospitable place I had forgotten just how depressing it can be and how it affects your mood and ruins the hotel. Mind you, I am not talking about luxury versus non luxury. I am merely talking about decent lodgings, somewhat welcoming staff and clean accommodations with some kind of ambience. It was so bad my mother actually left and went home early. It was not expensive if it had been nice, but as it was not even decent it was seriously expensive. We booked  the trip through Fritidsresor and stayed at the Viva Palma Nova. Bad idea all over, in every aspect, ranging from hotel to location. It was located in an awful location, with bars full of drunk Brits and Scandinavians running around in their bathing suits (if even that) in the streets, eating without their tops on in restaurants and generally embarrassing all of us who did not start drinking at breakfast nor who were not there to be shitfaced around the clock. The hotel rooms were small, dirty, the bed linens were of some kind of plastic material, and the beds extremely hard. There was no comforter, just a thin blanket, also of something polyestersish. The balcony of our first rooms faced a vet and parking lot area with garbage emptying at six every morning. We demanded room change and were placed on higher floor facing a garden which was nice, until the evening when the partying started. From seven to midnight we ‘enjoyed’ disco music so loud my son cried. The hotel did not help nor offer any understanding. And if I say that Fritidsresor (part of the Tui group) representative was unhelpful is putting it mildly. Let’s be frank, their representative was an ignorant, rude, and dumb girl with no manners or education whatsoever. She also lied, made things up on the fly and kept insulting me and my 74 year old mother. When the internet did not work she kept making excuses. Her best one was when she claimed that Spain was so underdeveloped and that it was simply impossible to get consistent, good  wifi in Spain. really, last time I checked Spain through the EU,  has invested a significant amount in their infrastructure and has some of the most modern IT systems in Europe. Then again, who am I to say this against a 20 year old girl who, as she said, knows this for a fact (even though she did not know what infrastructure meant. Yikes.). She then went on to claim that she could not get us a dong or mobile wifi (to provide the promised wifi) since in Spain it was impossible to get one ‘just like that’. She had asked all mobile providers and it was impossible. “Really it was like, totally, super impossible. Like really.” I asked myself in a nearby mobile store and it took five minutes to set it up.

The hotel refused to help my mother (who walks with cane) with her bag (I was not there at the time to carry it) and this representative when asked for help also refused, stating it was their policy. Wtf? She and the staff actually just stood there,  looking on, refusing to help, as a 74 year old woman drags her suitcase to the elevator (first down some stairs) and then has to drag the bag along a corridor, whilst limping along with a cane. Who does that?

The hotel refused to supply soap and shampoo after cleaning hours even though we had not been provided earlier. We arrived at midnight and naturally needed to clean up after the trip. Upon discovering there was no soap or shampoo, when asked for some the receptionist actually told me to go down to the pool shower and wash my hands rather than get me some soap. Really? Oh and when we did get soap the next day mind you, the soap container e that were attached to the sinks in both our rooms had black mold on them and the canisters had most likely never ever been removed and cleaned. So fucking disgusting, I am even having a hard time controlling my anger as I write this. If it had not been for my son, I did not want him to see me blow up, I would have made much more out of this then I did.  The part that is most difficult to describe is the attitude, of the hotel staff as well as of the Fritidsresor staff; their lack of any effort to help, to be kind, to be understanding, to take responsibility for their lacking hotel (Fritidsresor’s reps response was actually ‘Well none of this is my fault”) to make their paying guests tay nice. They were almost like zombies, interested, rude, illmannerd and well, for lack of  better word, ignorant. What else is a person that refuses to do their job or who is not imaginative enough to proactively make any effort to make their guests stay good?

As for the kids club. Yikes! I would not leave my kid there unattended for a second. It was run, and I say that lightly, by a Swedish and a Dutch girl, in their early twenties. They were inattentive, unengaged and clearly lacking any education or knowledge of child care. They were supposed to watch the kids but they let the kids leave the group, run off and they left the kids to play alone as they gossiped with each other and other (male) staff. The engagement and the activities were lackluster at best, the playground was not particularly clean and the material fro the activities was not complete or functioning. It was so bad, it would have made for a great comedy, a Chevy Chase vacation movie, if it were not so sad. My son who had been looking forward to it all, was so disappointed and of course did not want to be there. The hotel is rated 4 stars by fritidsresor. That is a joke. I rate it 2. The website pictures are extremely misleading.

Seriously, we were shocked by all the awful aspects of this so called holiday. We immediately rented a car to get away and spent our days exploring the island, daily dreading the return to the ‘hotel’. The decor and general air of the hotel reminded us of something out of a Roy Anderson movie, all gray, and then some more gray, only in this particular setting it was all a sickening shade of apricot, everything was apricot, monochrome and depressing. Seriously we were shocked and saddened What a dump! Yes, I am sorry, I do hear myself ranting here, and there is no excuse for that, except the simply fact that there is no excuse for Fritidsresor’s and the hotel’s and its staff’s behavior.

Do I recommend Mallorca? Unequivocally yes! I recommend it for the magnificent architecture, for the amazing stone houses, small, pretty cobbled street stones towns, year round outdoor cafes, excellent hiking and biking trails, stunning views, clean water and generally very welcoming ambience. The small towns are well preserved and restored, there are plenty of cozy cafes. Spain makes excellent cappuccinos, far more so than France or Italy I found, some of the best I ever had in fact and the cheeses, do not get me started on Mallorcean cheese. The mild, the strong, the in between, the goat the cow, the hard cheese, medium hard cheese. All so wonderful! I had no idea before I came just how good this would be, the cheeses rivaled some of my favorite French cheese. /rivaled, not beat). Just like in France they are more than enough pastry shops to go around and it is all good! It seems also that today, every single town boasts trendy, Michelin rated, restaurants cooking up everything from fusion, to avant garde Spanish feasts. This all comes at a hefty price, as do the cute boutique hotels which are found in even the most remote villages. Mallorca is NOT cheap. There are low cost versions of everything, but those are simply less expensive, not inexpensive. Wine however, does come in all price classes and you can get great Rioja and any price level almost.

As much as I recommend a visit to Mallorca, I do advise against going in the high season as the island is overrun with tourists. The roads get congested with chartered buses that hold up traffic, Palma is impossible to navigate on foot or car with people everywhere and the beaches get over crowded too. Most of all I suggest you stay away from the southern tips near Palma as well as the northern beaches, where most of the charter trips go. Unless you enjoy that kind of thing.

Just stop it already. Restaurants , cafes, subways, trains, planes, automobiles, any gathering with other people congregate are not places for bodily sounds. They just aren’t. Bodily sounds should be kept private. Period.

Sneezing and coughing can not be helped of course so, we will excuse those. Everything else should be kept in check. Forcibly listening to others gurgling, inhaling snot, clearing their throats (not once out of necessity but repeatedly, loudly) is disgusting. it is a nasty habit that I am utterly surprised at people not having been told by someone, their mother and father perhaps, that they must not do. Isn’t teaching your offspring how to behave in public an integral part of any decent upbringing?

Today I sit in a cafe in Parc Bit, in Palma Mallorca. I am happily typing away when a middle aged man, nicely dressed, clean looking, sits down next to me. Almost immediately he starts making a series of noises. Bodily noises. He deeply and loudly pulls snot, real or imaginary, up his nose, only to coughingly release it seconds later. Every few minutes he does it. It is awful. The more I try not to hear it, and gag, the worse it gets.

Based on my utterly unscientific observations, bodily sounds are much more frequent in males. Seldom do women breath loudly. You know the kind of breathing I am talking about, the kind that disturbs any movie, meeting or meal, heavy, almost panting breathing, not to say the quieter kind isn’t as disturbing, the wheezing one loud enough to be heard but not so loud that everyone hears it. For god’s sake breathing quietly is possible for most of us, why not for you too?

I hate to make this into a women/men thing, but based on my observations it is. Seldom do women do weird semi-coughing, throat clearing, snorting noises repeatedly, interferingly. I think women are probably too self conscious. I know I am. I am utterly and completely aware of my bodily sounds and I keep them in complete check when in public. I try hard not to disturb others in all ways, after all I am not alone in any public space. If I don’t want to hear a noise, then I won’t make it. Fair enough.

I wonder though, if the people making all these revolting noises even know they are making them? I think not, after all who wants to be disgusting? Then, I wonder, why has no one told the person in question that they are in fact seriously disgusting and asked them to stop it, now, immediately and forever. There are nice ways to say it and if it doesn’t stop, there are plenty of not so nice ways to inform someone that they are rude and obnoxious, ways that will make them shut up and show common decency and consideration of others.

How can some foamy milk, coffee and sprinkles of chocolate taste so damn good? The Spanish know how to make them, I have yet to have a bad one. The best are, without a doubt, at Cafe Cappuccino but they are also the most expensive at 4 euros a pop. Not ok. But damn they are good, Foamy, creamy, without any traces of bitterness, just perfectly soft, warm and delicious.